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Thursday, February 25, 2010

"Keeping It Real"


What's the definition of that? i learned the more money you make, the more people want to take. Also, the more money you have the responsibility gets harder. People feel as though since they see me on TNT or my movies on HBO and my albums sitting in best buy, that hmmm multi millionaires don't have problems of there own. What I'm trying to say is how much longer do you be nice and take care of your boys personal problems? we live in a fucked up era where now a days nigga's forget all the good you may have done for them, so if u don't help them out this one time they might want to slander your name back at home. Now they friends on the block saying stupid stuff like "Man that nigga got millions he want loan you 4,000$"? "that's not right man" "that nigga lame for that he rich as hell" We watch all these movies like "menace" "Boyz N The Hood" and feel as though if we dont help our boys out thats the wrong thing to do. Man listen, i don't know how many lawyers, baby mommas, mommas, i had to feed out my pocket because of my boy's idiotic mistakes. Mind you its more than 3, so it adds up. ive done so much for friends. Took em out the hood, moved em in with me, let them live the lifestyle i lived and give them money, but they all mess it up. So I'm here to say that sometimes you gotta think about yourself sometimes and say NO! because its like a bad kid, if u keep letting your baby act up or get his way and u dont do nothing what happens? he'll keep doing it. get the point? Every time they mess up, they gone feel like they can go to you for they problems every time they have 1. Also as a grown man you want to provide for yourself. So when i hear people say the want to be rich, i say analyze the situation. Look at how much pressure i have to deal with. fans and friends its alot. The worst part is saying no to your friend because well... 'HE OR SHE IS YOUR FRIEND" and u feel bad if you dont help em out. When ever you fill like by saying no to them makes u feel bad, just think of all the good things you did for that person. If they can't respect what you did for them, then they never was your friend to begin with. Now are you keeping it real?

62 comments:

Anonymous said...

Love yĆ” Blogg !

bluvonline said...

I AGREE BOW, AND TO BE HONEST, YOUR FRIENDS ARE BEING SELFISH! REGARDLESS OF HOW MUCH MONEY YOU HAVE, IF THEY DECIDE TO GET IN TROUBLE AND COME RUNNING BACK TO YOU THAT SHOWS THAT YOUR NOTHING BUT A BAIL OUT..YOU HAVE TO SAY NO AND THEY HAVE TO MAN UP!

Kman11 said...

thats real shit rite there, u can only help people out so much...after a while they gotta help themselves

Anonymous said...

(TWITTER.COM/LANETTD).....I FEEL YOU BOW.... I REALLY DO. AS A MAN U MADE YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE..YOU HELPED YOUR FRIENDS.. YOU DID YOUR PART.. YOU DONT HAVE TO PUT UP WITH THAT. ITS YOUR LIFE YOUR MONEY LIVE IT UP.. IF THEY TAKE IT FOR GRANTED THEN ITS NOT MEANT TO BE. I DONT KNOW HOW MANY TIMES I TOLD U BUT U DESERVE THE BEST...JUST STAY TRUE TO YOURSELF... CAUSE U BEEN GOT THE POINT..YOUR JUST REACTING ON IT..IM GLAD YOU SHARED THIS BLOG BECAUSE..NO ONES PERFECT AND YOUR SHOWING A SIDE TO THE GAME THAT EVERYONES FEAR YOU FEEL ME

Takeisha Rayson said...

It is how we tend to view money and the true value of it that makes it become a burden or a blessing. It goes back to the notion that the love of money is what makes it evil and not the money itself. Everyone wants money because that what it takes to live in this world that was created and operates partially by the energy of the dollar. The key is understanding how to truly pay it forward so that not only can you prosper, but also so that other's can prosper. What's the saying, "Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day, Teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime." This reigns true and creating opportunities when you have been afforded the means to do will be much more gratifying and multiplying than handing over money to idiots for idiotic situations. And, maybe, just maybe, they will then be able to pay it forward one day.

Anonymous said...

THATS REAL TALK BRO I FEEL YOU

Anonymous said...

REAL TALK BOW..Nigguha needa start using their brains now days and become MEN...instead of ACTING like men dude.
and u dun needa b doin a year and a day! LIKE EVERY OTHER RAPPER this and last year for sum dumb shit..way to much to loose. stay up fam
i been a true fan since u were 12 lol we da same age so u alredy dunkno u an inspiration son.
stay up

www.myspace.com/jessyjamesfam90

tdot

NaturallyNik said...

Well put.... u can only give and do so much. A true friend would understand that.

Unknown said...

I was told the best thing you can do 4 your friends and your HOOD is to stay rich! If you get broke then who they gone look up to. And they can't say they don't look up to you if you are feeding them hundreds! ha! Chill WILL!

Meska J. said...

I agree.

Christine Rubynee said...

Hey bow, you are so true... As layman talk, i like your genuine and your generosity... Friends can only be a part of life and they can't be everything... You need to run for your life 1st... Keep it real and blazin boy... GOD bless...

shivi143 said...

you said it you just got to put it into action

Walk With Me said...

my mom always said don't help some one who doesn't want to help them selves. on that note if ur friends cant stay out trouble or your pockets fuck em. escapally if you sat them down and let them know how you feel!

Anonymous said...

Very good entry. Its unfortunate how friends can sometimes take generosity for granted. Its good to help those in need, but you can't keep giving and giving. We do have breaking points. To those who always give, you should re-analyze your priorities. Thank you for sharing a great blog! Paz e Amor

Unknown said...

If they can only see you for the naw and not for what you have done in the past they are not worth keeping around in your life. You cant better yourself with ppl like this around. There is no progress without struggle and this is just a sturggle to help you progres

Vanetta Ruebens said...

thats the truth...you shouldn't have to put up with it you did your best to help them a...they should be grateful and take up their own responsibilities that's what life is about and being an adult.. you live and learn though and its ok to say no

Anonymous said...

I agree with what your saying Bow Wow and yes there is going to be sometimes when you are going to have to say no. But do realize that not everyone is perfect and we're all going to make mistakes. Some people keep making the same mistakes while other realize this and try to mkae a change. I think you should sit down and talk to your friends and let them know how you feel about everything and how you have to constantly bail them out. If they can't see your point of view then maybe they should re-analyze their friendship with you or at least try to put themselves in your shoes.

ASHLEY.!! said...

This is true. If your friends can't appreciate YOU (Bow) for the things you do for them, those aren't true friends. A real friend would try to atleast get a job and attempt if not begin paying you back all the money they've borrowed from you. Sometimes you have to take a step back and let them get in trouble in order for them to realize how much of a good friend you are to them. Thenthey'll begin to appreciate everything. Not everyone you associate yourself with is a real friend. Some people are there just to mooch off of you. Because as soon as ya friends [baby mamas, mommas, etc..] find out that they know you personally...the first thing that pops in their head is "oh this nigga has no money and Bow is payin for kids from what I hear...maybe I should get pregnant too.." That's not right!! Some women are GREEDY & STINGY! They'll make your life hell and so will those so called friends if you let them. So be the stick up kid boo. Stick to the beat of ya own drum not everybody elses. (: Love you pumpkin. Have a great day!

bankhead said...

I feel it u betta then me cuz I wouldn't even start bailing mf out, but dnt get me wrong I gt bout 4 real friends now that rocks wit me n we will do anything 4 each other n that's who I wud rock wit win ever I make it big but ill put them on 2 were they can make they own money,but I say that bcuz u goin 2 have people cum @ u from all diff angles talkn bout they your friend but I say if u neva broke your back for me when we both didn't have shit then I'm not giving hand outs..so bow cut they ass off u should of been did that bruh

Unknown said...

right man!

Unknown said...

Real shit bow and I respect u for the honesty. I learn to say "No" last year and that shit feels good when I say it to ungrateful ppl. I help those who are in desprite needs not those who refuse to help their self after I done gave the first boost. Life is a gamble u win some u lose some. Fuck friends cuz at the end of the day ur still left standing by yourself. Some friend I do appreciate becuz they appreciate me. And those are the ones I would help no Marta wat becuz they would do the same and I call them family. I feel wat ur sayin trust even when tax time comes ppl think u the riches mutha ducker for those few months. Just to blow my money but u know wat I tell dem "hell no". I got a mouth to feed and barely making it get the fuck outta here with that lol. Your the truth dawg even tho u Neva reply back to me on Twitter @citygirl305 i'm a fan and also an upcoming miami female artist. Neva a groupie #imjustsayin lol holla at me. Shit I can be ur first lady artist on ur label serious inquiry I live this music shit. Don't sleep on me but if let's get it $$$ hit me on my Twitter if u wanna take this oppertunity I won't let u down trust me. @citygirl305 holla!

Anonymous said...

Well here's how I see it! You messed up from the beginning. You never know who your true friends are until you don't have nothing or the word "No" comes out you mouth. & trust me I know from experience & I'm just an average woman. When you weren't "rich" your friends didn't need anything fron you because they felt that ya'll were on the same level. But now that you're so much more they are going to need. & the only time you're supposed to say yes to them is when they really need. Meaning they have had to try to do whatever it is that they couldn't do for themselves first before coming to you. As for letting people move in & giving them money, who are you? Their damn daddy! You definitely need to get a handle on shit or you're going to forever go through this! Good day, Shad.

C-Heat said...

Yo Bow, great post, I feel ya there.
It's weird how we are told to be unselfish and they mark selfish people as bad people, but at the same time they tell us to think about ourselves and be selfish at times.
It's a strange world, but hang in there bro. Much respect.

Raquel J. said...

I simply love this post, This is why i love Bow Wow, he keeps it 100% Everything he just mentioned is so true, and we have to sometimes be careful who we are entertaining, and who we allow in our personal space... This is the Best post so far 2 me

Unknown said...

Kids are told by their parents no plenty of times.....for all the right reasons. But in this case its worse...it seems like you're babysitting your friends by giving them the world and much more. You need 2 start saying no....some things are just ridiculous. And I feel its pretty selfish for your friends 2 keep coming 2 u with their issues....they need 2 man up and take responsibility for themselves. And if u never tell them no they'll never learn.....you know wats right and you've done good 4 them already so 4 them 2 turn around and bring negativity in response 2 a no would make me question their true friendship......*twitter.com/BNicole12*

Unknown said...

@japonada ;You're right man, sometimes you gotta say no

Unknown said...

It is hard to tell your friends no, but you're right sometimes it really needs to be done. They got to learn to go out and do things for themselves and not rely on you to do it for them.

Unknown said...

Im not sure if you got my reply on twitter but I stated that in your position that people try to take advantage of your status. Not everyone but you would think that those people you consider your friends would realize that you have more important things to accomplish than bailing folks out of trouble. When people notice that you are going to help them no matter what they will continue to use that to their advantage. Communicate your issues with these friends and just see whether they change. If not they care less about how you feel. Keep it moving and do your thing!

Unknown said...

true friends shouldn't and wouldn't ask for anything from you, apart from those things that friends should give, like advice.I think you saying NO is the way forward, or else you will just be used and abused.

BeautyRush08 said...

That is SO TRUE Bow you can only do so much for people. If they cant appreciate all the things you have done for them in the psat then they really truly and honestly weren't "REAL" freinds from the jump, just like you said you have mouths to feed as well you have bills to pay just like everybody else, trust me I understand. The best things for you 2 do is just SAY NO as a huge fan of yours I know you have a HUGE HEART your so giving and un-selfish, and thats one of the many things I love about you as a man, you look out for the ones you care about and you love but dont let people RUN OVER YOU because they will, especially if they aint real...they see you with all that money and expect you to look out for them cuz u they home boy and we grew up together and we from the same hood and all that and thats wrong...These young black males need to step up and stop making all these bad mistakes and decisons thats not only going to effect them but the people they love, their families, their children (if they have any), and alot of other people who care about them as well. Dont ever stop being the loving caring and giving man you are today Bow, but just make sure people arent running all over you and using you, and also know who your real friends are! LOVE YOU, GOD BLESS! :)

NishaMarquise said...

I tweeted this to you but I post it here also for emphasis... The first law of nature is self-preservation. Everyone should understand that concept.

Nisha
XOxo

shivi143 said...

Only you can evaluate the limit of what is right and wrong...to what extent you should help someone, especially friends. When it gets above and beyond that limit You should be able to recognise it...sometimes you gotta press pause on the feelings to do what is right for yourself. A real friend wouldn't put you in a predicament where you feel emotionally obliged to have to help them out. Yes life may have created problems for them but if they always got you to fall back on how are they ever gona learn to pick themselves up again if you not around to do it for them. There is always a limit to how much you should do.

Ladytee2 said...

THAT IS SO TRUE SWEETIE I FEEL YOU ON THAT THERE ARE SO MANY PEOPLE THAT YOU CAN HELP BUT ARE SO UNGRATEFUL THAT U DID ENOUGH FOR THEM. I AM SORT OF IN THAT BOAT LIKE THAT I HELP ALOT WITH MY FAMILY MAJORITY THE TIME AND A FRIEND I DID BUT I CHILL THAT OUT A WHOLE LOT.

I LOVE YOUR BLOG KEEP IT COMING
FOLLOW ME ON MY TWITTER @LADYTEE2 REPRESENT HOUSTON

Anonymous said...

love u blogz :)
follow me plz @lilresh

Dayvon said...

Yea i know exactly where u coming from bro! Its ok to say no. You've always been there for your homies and sometimes you have to draw the line and say no this shit getting out of line. If they go back home and talk shit about you then that mean they never kept it 100 with you from the get go! I respect you for sharing your wealth even though you don't have to do that. God said its better to give then receive. A lot of people judge and hate on you but they don't see what you do for people behind closed doors. You're a good dude.. even Rashard told me that when he saw you in chicago. He seemed impressed! God bless family.... LBW/ CMB/ YM!! 100!!!

Unknown said...

That's all tru bra... I feel where u comin from.. U can't always be there to support ur boys cuz it seems like they're just using u for ur money when u was kind enough to take them out the hood. I think they just might be takin ur kindness for weakness cuz if u had to give money to baby mamas, that's taking it entirely too far. If they grown enough to make those kids then they should be grown enough to take care of em too. It seems like all u tryna do is the right thing, but there is only so much u can do before the shit starts to get outta hand. U got ur own problems to deal wit and having to worry bout supporting grown ass men is doin too damn much. Oh yea by the way u put "fill" instead of "feel" lol just a side note bra

heller x dopee said...

i think them type of people are familiar with others solving there problems; no matter who you are your going to have to struggle;and to make it as a strong person sometimes you just gotta flow at it by yourself; do your thing as long as you can stand yourself at the end of the day thats all that matters; everyone else who basically just want you there on a "just incase" standby, thats for the birds they just taking your good heartedness for granted.

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kerry said...

Bow, I first hand know what you are dealing with and I am nowhere near the financial bracket you are, but I know this. Saying yes all the time will only enable your friends. They wont learn, change, or grow if you continue to be their crutch. Also, is the support you give truly reciprocated? Support can come in many forms, it doesnt need to always be financial or legal and shouldnt be. You know whats best. Be Well

carlanxo said...

hey, doubt you will read this but anyway can u follow me on twitter? am new and i have no followers yet... i no how sad lol! i'll let u be my first lol....... ;-p

dYmOnD sTuDdEd said...

My dad once told me if you want to know who your real friends are loan them some money. The harsh reality is that people don't want to see the next man with what he has not and also feels that he should enjoy all the fruits of the labour that you have sown, take a biblical reference to Cain and Abel. If you were not fortunate enough to amend these situations how would they be solved? People need to step back and take small things like loyalty respect and being a man into consideration. Your friend should have repaid you for your prior assistance whether you had money or not cuz in the "hood" people get killed for small change just because of the principle. A real man would not be asking his boy to support and feed his family. Real men take care of their seed not expect their well off friend to hold them down. To conclude if these friends can't honor your word when you say no they don't RESPECT you, and are probably phony kicking it.

Anonymous said...

A real friiend is able to understand everything whatever circumstances...

Krystal said...

WoW! I agree. I love you for sharing your opinions and views with us.I dont know if you read these comments but it means alot that you right your own blog and we can see what you think and not what we hear on tv or the media. We all know BowWow but this blog lets us into the mind of Shad Moss. I think that more artist should do this. I love how you have grown. I learn so much from you AND Khleo. Its like we're talking. I dont know if I will ever meet you and get to talk to you face to face but until then, I can read these blogs and they will pose as our conversation. I even read things that I dont normally read or know about by your topics. Its as if your reading my thoughts and posting them up. But my issue is more dealing with parents than friends although this post speaks on the issue I have recently dealt with,with friends. I have issues with my father and I heard your song,"Father's Day" and I relate to the lyrics in the song. So I appreciate you Lil' no BowWow no Bow no Shad Moss. Krystal aka Missfizz1b2k

Brooklyn said...

i definitely agree and i think the problems always show up even before you have money. real friends dont show up to you only when they need money, real friends will learn to take care of themselves and be adults. its not your job as a friend to support someone's lifestyle and take care of their kids. your job as a friend is to be a moral support and be an example so that they can stand on their own two feet. "NO" is a word that people must learn to say in order to secure their own lifestyle.

Crystal Couture said...

You are so right, people take others for granted because they know what that other person can do for them, I believe you can only do so much for a person and let them provide for themselves.Sometimes when you get yourself in situation you cannot get out of, you just got to deal with it, that's how you mature. Those who act like the other person they lean on for help is not doing enough or saying oh they got this so they should help a sister or brother out,that's wrong if they say the other person is wrong from not helping and you basically helped them all yourlife. I can't have that I would tell them in a nice humble way, this is my money that I work for, if you don't appreciate what I have done for you then, I don't need you as a friend, that's just my opinion, I hope there's a resolution for you and others who is going through this kind of situation, it's really sad.

Marie said...

OMG, somebody needed to vent.
You are absolutely right. If you've given them more than enough chances after they messed up, you're DONE! It's not your responsibility. Help those who are trying to help themselves. My policy is never lend it if you think you will miss it, that's clearly not your situation but it does add up like you said. My dad came into a small amount of $ and started telling everybody he knew. STUPID!! People started coming out the wood works askin for loans. MONEY LOOKS BETTER WHEN ITS INVISIBLE! Sorry you have to deal with that. Keep your head up, your real friends won't take advantage of you like that. I hope you read ALL of these comments, maybe it will help you feel better about the situation. <3 u!

Anonymous said...

Damn homie but I feel you I was like that in high school I always had money but then when I got it all the homies wanted some but now look at me i'm broke as a joke wit nothing. I wish i could have gone back and invested my money.

inbetweenthalinez said...

Amen shad u can only help someone for so long an because u have money they take advantage of u its ok to say no u did all u can do stay blessed noo stress be easy

sayane said...

i'm agree with u ...luv ur blog

Anonymous said...

wow...now I see what the wow stands for in Bowwow. I just want to say that you are a smart and intelligent brother. You hit it right on point. Friends and family have to learn that you're helping them to help, not to hinder. They're given a chance to make things right. If they don't take the advantage of the help given then it's their loss and hopefully they'll see later. So you did good. You are no longer a hindrance to them.

~Lakeside~

Katie Gou. said...

This is the instance where "a friend in need is a friend indeed" rears its ugly head. Sure, as friends we have a duty to be there for our pals but in the same instance, do we not have the right to be treated with respect? Stop and ask yourself, when does your friend come to you? Is it only when he or she needs money? If so, then I guess we need to ask ourselves seriously what we mean to this person! A friend in need is indeed a friend, but a friend with false intentions is a frenemy. I often worry about being known as a "yes person": the friend who's a pushover and will do anything for anyone. Don't be that. Trust your intuition. Seems like your gut is telling you something. People seem too quick to ask you for money. Maybe you've been too quick to say yes. Look back and see what these people have done for you. Have they been there for you? Have they helped you out in non monetary ways? Or have they filled you with guilt for not stumping up the cash?

It's your life, so only you know the answers but to me, the fact you doubt these people speaks volumes. Trust the gut! :)

Nichole said...

I understand bow, but like you said sometimes you have to say no. great blog. I like reading your blogs. Keep doin you

Anonymous said...

I've been through the same thing in the past and I've helped out a few people in my life as well, so called friends I mean. I told myself that I would never do it again after seeing that those type of people will never pay you back. People will take your kindness for weakness easily. I learned that the hard way but I'm going to continue to make things happen for me and my close family.

Anonymous said...

AMEN

HiTz said...

REAL!!! Talk...I RESPECT Dat I Go Tru The Same Thing & It Hurt When They Don't C It SO u Have 2 Put A S On Ur Chest & SURVIVE! Cause & The End Of The Day All U Have Is U,Urself & Ur's....LBW CMB All DAy

Antoinette said...

This is so true. I think this may be my favorite blog so far because I think it is something alot of people can relate to (not necessarily being rich but in general terms). It's not your job to take care of them. They have to learn to take care of themselves, just as you have worked hard for all that you have and have made sacrifices. But you still remembered your friends and have done alot for them over the years, yet it seems as if they just keep asking for more. I have had friendships where I felt as if I was giving so much and receiving so little in return, so is that a true friendship? Especially if you tell someone no one time and they turn on you...? No that's not even right, everyone has the right to say no. I understand that having the money is not the problem, it's the principle behind the whole thing and it can make you feel as if you are being used at the same time. I can see that you are a very selfless person and that you do alot for others but you have to be able to take care of yourself in order to even do that, so you need to worry about yourself first and foremost (not in a selfish way), but so that you are not always putting everyone and their happiness above your own. Anyone who even has you in their life should feel blessed because I can tell that you are a truly amazing person.

Much Love,
Nette

Niq said...

I think that sometimes in this generation we live unrealistically. People don't really do things from the heart anymore. They more so do things so that they can hold it over your head. I feel like I was always willing to help others, but then they always expect a hand out from then on. Idk, sometimes people need to hear "No" and if they don't like it..oh well

.... said...
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Nickdaquick007 said...

Choose your friends wisely. You cant choose your family but you can choose your friends. So you should your friends, like you would choose your family if you had that option. RealTalk

What It Is....Cuban Luxury Style said...

I totally understand that. That is being very selfish on the parts of your "FRIENDS". But you can tell when a nigga is playing the situation and you. And sometimes we tend to let people in too close. Keep more people at a distance. And give them a situation to really show their true colors. It works.

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